Life Bites

Life has a funny way of playing tricks on you. Sometimes when you think everything is fine and dandy, life suddenly sneaks behind you and throws you one of those big curveballs. It just hits right smack at you, that there isn’t any time to react. I’m not fond of surprises (well, except for the happy ones though. hehe). You’re caught unprepared. By the time you start to act on it, everything’s over already. Useless na. It leaves you with an awful feeling, like a bad case of stomachache. You feel weak and vulnerable, unable to think or move. You feel stupid, wishing you had known earlier. You feel hopeless and clueless on what you’re going to do about it.

I don’t know, but it seems like these past few weeks, life has been throwing me a lot of these curveballs along my way. It’s not a good feeling. It leaves you drained and sometimes sad. It leaves me with a lot of disoriented thoughts. I can’t think straight and clear at all. I feel bad for not knowing how to go about it. If only I had it my way, I just wish people would tell me beforehand so that I would know what to expect. Even if the truth hurts, I’d rather they tell me straight up. At least I can prepare myself and I would know what to do. Better yet I wish I could have the foresight to see things ahead of time. Sana manghuhula nalang ako.

Big Girls Don't Cry

Watching PBB housemate Geeann giving up Pamela, her most treasured doll may seem funny at first. Why would somebody cry so much for a doll right? But then after awhile you’d slowly understand where she’s coming from. The doll has been with her since she was a child. Pamela has been her constant comfort friend for years. Parting will always not be easy.

Each one of us probably have our own share of experiences of losing or having to part with something (or someone). The decision to let go is hard as it is. But it’s the moving on after the letting go part that’s really a big bummer (sorry for the lack of word). It’s not easy to lose all so suddenly the familiarity, constant-ness, bond that you’ve grown so accustomed to. It’s like a comfort security blanket thing that we hold on to dearly. Some have placed a sentimental attachment to it, while some see it as their emotional investment, while some have a deep personal commitment to it…all of which makes it so hard to part away with once the planets conspire and calls you to do what you’ve been dreading—to let go and give up on it.

It takes a whole lot of getting used to in dealing with the initial absence. There isn’t really any trick to make that not-so-good feeling go away. You just have to be strong, accept it, and learn to deal with it.