On Giving Up

When do you give up on something (or someone)? Is it some automatic switch programmed into us that signals us to start raising the white flag? Just like how we sometimes get these instant light bulb ideas, it is not planned. You just wake up one day and realize you’re going to stop trying. No reasons to justify the whys. You just feel that it’s the best right thing to do.

People have different thresholds as to how far they can go. As one friend would like to put it, we have our own saturation points. It is where you’ve tried (and tried) until you’ve reached a point where you frankly don’t care anymore with the outcome. You’re just too tired to think about it, even for just a second. And all you want to do is to detach yourself on that something (or someone, or situation-whichever) and give up.

Does it make one an official loser for giving up? Does one deserve a big “L” slapped on his/her forehead for not trying hard enough? How about if the person does not give up and keeps on trying until he/she dies, do we congratulate him/her for being a martyr (or a hero)? It’s a tough question to answer. It’ll probably spark up long debates and bring out more unanswered questions.

In my humble opinion, a person who gave up (but tried his/her very damn best) deserves credit too. I would definitely give an ‘A’ for effort. Situations and people are hard to change. While we can have a hand in influencing the outcome, it is still something that is not entirely within our control. There will always be limitations as to how far we can go. We can put our two cents worth of effort in it but if hanggang dun nalang, then so be it. If you think about it, those who have tried and gave up are actually heroes in their own right. At least they’re brave enough to give up, admit that they can't do it, and come into terms with reality (yes, even if the truth hurts). They accept things for what they are and get on with their lives. Sometimes giving up can actually make life so much easier, don't you think so?

Everything Good List

It's been awhile since I had this list. It's always nice to do this list and relish all the good and nice things. So here it goes.

-Nano Hana along Valero St. Makati. Melts in your mouth wagyu steak. Fresh hamachi. Crispy tempura. Good tea.
-HSBC Champions 2006, Shanghai China. Being able to watch some of the world's best golfers play.
-Being able to see Tiger Woods practice and play live. Enough said.
-Luke Donald. Eye candy. Crush worthy. My new idol.
-Seeing world's No.1 Roger Federer in flesh..Gwapo rin! Haha
-the fast approaching Christmas season. I can feel it already!
-McDonald's Chicken Rice Burger. Better when it comes with fries.
-McDonald's hashbrowns. A very recent discovery for me!
-my FRIENDS. Close, not so close, and acquaintances included.
-laughing for no reason. laughing at Dad's corny jokes.
-being able to keep in touch despite of and inspite of...
-having silly conversations
-KOI and a cool aquarium. New pet fishes, thanks to Glenn. It's not mine though. Hehe
-iPod Nano's Red Edition.
-spa massages. Aaaahh...feels so good especially after a workout
-The Entourage. Definitely tops my fave tv show list.
-getting more than 8 hours of sleep
-Hizon's regular ensaymada
-Sunday mornings and Saturday afternoons :)

Are YOU my Friend or Acquaintance?

I always remember my mom telling me I should consider myself extremely lucky if I could have 2 or 3 real close friends. I find this rather true especially now that I don’t go to school anymore, where I used to see my friends nearly everyday. Now I have 2 friends whom I consider my best best friends, plus 3 more if I include my sisters. While I do have a handful of friends, I can’t really say that I have a solid meaningful relationship with each one of them. Some are good casual friends while some are just plain acquaintances. This is what Malcolm Gladwell prefers to call as “weak ties”, friendly yet casual social connections. This used to frustrate me, having a lot of weak ties and only having a few close friends. I don’t like doing the small talk routine, the “Hi, hello! How you doing? Okay bye” stuff. I want to have friends whom I could have good long meaningful conversations with and whom I can be my crazy self without getting judged. But with hectic schedules, busy careers and love lives to attend to, it’s virtually impossible to remain in contact with everybody. It takes a looot of effort and time to maintain relationships, what more build a new one right?

So how do you choose which friends you’d like to keep as a good friend and just as an acquaintance only? While I don’t consciously choose whom I should be friends with, according to Malcolm Gladwell (he’s a genius for having this kind of thinking), we usually become friends with the people we do things with and whom we resemble the most. We don’t seek out friends; we just relate a lot more to those people who occupy the same space that we do. Most of us, he says, keep our acquaintances at arm’s length since we already have our own circle of friends to whom we are devoted. “The reason we don’t send birthday cards to people we don’t really care a great deal about is that we don’t want to feel obliged to have dinner with them or see a movie with them or visit them when they’re sick. The purpose of making an acquaintance, for most of us, is to evaluate whether we want to turn that person into a friend; we don’t feel we have the time or the energy to maintain meaningful contact with everyone.” (Gladwell, Tipping Point).

However this does not mean we should take our acquaintances for granted. Weak ties are just as important, if not sometimes even more important than the strong ties we have. Gladwell offers a different perspective. He says that the more acquaintances we have, the more powerful we actually become. Acquaintances can give us access to opportunities and worlds to which we don’t belong to. Acquaintances can also bring new ideas and information that they are more likely to know that we or our friends (since they occupy the same world that we do, they most probably know what we already know) don’t.

I think I should learn to see the value and pleasure in casual meetings. I feel that I should also invest equal amounts of time and effort in my acquaintances the same as I do with my friends. I should be happy and grateful I have weak ties. I shouldn’t feel frustrated if the person or people I want to know better, whom I want to cultivate a relationship with doesn’t share the same sentiment. After all an acquaintance gained is still an added wealth. ;)

Mirror Mirror on the Wall...Who's the Fairest of Them All?

Candice and I accompanied my mom today to Marie France. Just out of curiosity, we got ourselves a free body assessment and free trial treatments. So what is the verdict? I’m within my ideal body weight (yehey!) BUT (yeah there’s always the big BUT) I’m 21% over my fat percentage and some “problem areas” would have to be addressed as well…which means I would need to undergo the fat metabolic program whatever that means. Grabe, after having a talk with the head consultant, I think I’ve never felt fatter in my whole life. I must say their marketing tactics are working well. Hehe

All the treatments were relaxing. I didn’t know these kinds of machines and procedures even existed at all. I enjoyed the cold body wrap. You get wrapped up like a mummy in this very cold solution which is supposed to lower your body’s normal temperature, so that the excess fat will be used up to maintain the body’s heat. According to the therapist, this can shave off around 2000 calories which is equivalent to 2 weeks worth of exercise. Could you imagine that?! No need to work your ass off at the gym anymore. You just lie in a bed for 25 minutes and voila! There’s also this other treatment that I liked. They attach these circular patches to the different parts of your body and you’ll feel waves of electric pulses/shock in varying intensities. This one is supposed to tone your body. Twenty minutes of doing this is equivalent to at least 200 sit-ups.

I had fun doing all of the treatments. It was an interesting experience. It just made me realize the extent that some people are willing to go through for the sake of vanity. Not only do you need lots (and lots) of time and effort, you also need a fat bank account. Hehe You wouldn’t believe how much the program that they designed for me costs. I don't think so! Hehe And even if you can afford it—time, effort, and money, I don’t think people can be satisfied long enough. Perfection can never be achieved…not in this world anyway.

By Meredith Grey

"I think you should. I think we should all just go there. You know tell the truth, spit it out, go with your gut, follow your instincts." 

I Heart Russia

1. City traffic is bad, even worse than Manila. There's no specific time for their rush hour. It seems like rush hour for them lasts for almost the entire day. With at least eight lanes on both sides, I don’t understand why it is still traffic.



2. The metro (a.k.a. subway) in Moscow is the complete opposite of what a typical subway station should look like. It looks so elegant, adorned with nice chandeliers and mosaic paintings. If it weren't for the old and rusty trains, you'd think you're somewhere else.



3. Russians are blessed with good genes. Almost everybody can pass for a model. Everyone’s tall, white, and handsome. Everyone’s good looking. Unfortunately I was not able to take home some souvenir pictures with me. :(

4. Their cathedrals do not have benches or pews. Russians celebrate Mass standing, for two long hours! You won't find a chair. But it's okay, mas astig naman cathedral nila kaysa sa atin.




5. Red means beautiful in Russian. Hence, Red Square equals Beautiful Square.



6. Kremlin means fortress in Russian. Hence, the Kremlin Wall equals the Fortress.

7. The Russian royalties are obsessed with anything gold. Now people in this day and age don’t have to feel as guilty anymore knowing that people during the olden days are even more extravagant and materialistic compared to us. I can just imagine how uncomfortable it is for the women to endure banquet dinners with their tight fitting corsets.




8. Saying NO in Russian is easy to remember. Just say NYEH or NYEH-NYEH! Reminds me of this Filipino phrase we use when we want to make fun of other people, Nyeh-Nyeh-Nyeh-Nyeh-Nyeh! Yes translates to DA! or DA-DAM! in Russian.

9. The matroyshka dolls are more popular than Barbie. I've practically grown up with Ken and Barbie. So I plead my allegiance to Barbie dolls.

10. St. Petersburg has only 60 days of sunshine throughout the year. It never fails to rain every single day. So I consider myself lucky for being able to catch a glimpse of their breathtaking sunrise.

My Crush List

I'm crushing on..

1. Samsung's Ultra Edition 9.9 (SGH-D830)

2. 8GB iPod Nano (Black or Pink)

3. Bvlgari's Diagono

4. Young Blood's Kabuki Soft Brushes (made out of goat's hair)

5. Daphne Osena's Antique Gold Charm Necklaces

GOOD Presents: NYChildren Photography Project

Brilliant project. Very nice. I wish it was made longer though. The idea was for photographer Danny Goldfield to photograph one child from every country on Earth all living in New York City.




Note: Video may take awhile to load. Here's the direct link,
http://video.yahoo.com/video/play?vid=ae4482b5b3c41e1e8663af3630ff4020.900638&cache=1

Fight Blue and White!

Ateneo lost. We lost. It was a game well fought until the end. I was lucky to find tickets last minute. Thanks to Jean’s persistence and convincing powers. Hehe It’s been awhile since I cheered my heart out and screamed like crazy. I didn’t care if I was surrounded by a sea of people wearing yellow shirts with their matching yellow balloons, I was just too damn proud of my alma mater (yeah even if we lost). The UST people are a friendly bunch. If it were an ADMU-DLSU game, I would probably think twice about sitting with the enemy. Just kidding.

It was a good game, down to the wire until the last second. At least sulit naman. I enjoyed the game even if I don’t know all of the players’ names anymore especially those on the other teams. I lost track after Fonacier-Villanueva-Gonzales-Bugia-Tenorio went to play for the professional league. Hehe Macky Escalona is my new idol now.














(i) Ateneo Warm-Up; (ii) Amidst the yellow, I still see Blue















(iii) All Blue; (iv) Go Ateneo! Animo Ateneo!

Post-Weather Report

After three days of darkness and drought, things are slowly getting back to normal. The typhoon not only left thousands of people homeless, it also left thousands of uprooted trees all over the metro. I actually witnessed the trees literally fall off, its branches being swept off by the strong winds. Seriously, naawa talaga ako sa mga trees. Makati seems so bare now. Everywhere I go, I see fallen trees both old and new. It’s sad.


Our car also bore the brunt of the typhoon. The windshield got smashed, the whole of it totally shattered. I’m not sure though whether the typhoon should be blamed or it’s just plain carelessness of Mang Elmer. He literally drove into a tree branch. Good thing there’s insurance.



If there’s anything good that came out of it, business has been doing very good. Herds of people have been flocking to our stores to eat. Dumami sobra mga tao. I don’t know if it’s the aftereffects of the typhoon or because it was payday weekend or because electricity was not 100% up yet, it seemed like everybody wanted to go out and are eager to eat.

To-Do List

My things to-do’s for this week:

1. Worry less.
2. Think less.
3. Control less.
4. Laugh more.
5. Share more.
6. Exercise more.
7. Eat less.
8. Get in touch more.
9. Believe more.
10. Pray more.

Control

It’s nearing the end of the week again. Wasn’t it just Saturday yesterday? And we’re in the ber months already. Aaack! I wish somebody could hit the stop button. I can’t help but think I’m wasting my time on a lot of things. I always get that nagging feeling when I feel unproductive. Maybe we’re all programmed to think that we’re useless if we have all the extra time in the world, meaning we’re not busy--busy as in the “super busy-harassed with career” or the “super busy-stressed out with life” kind.

I attended a class a couple of weeks back, and the instructor taught us the importance of BEING HERE now. This phrase stuck to me like glue. There are times when I’m so preoccupied that I forget to live and be present in the moment. I always feel the need to control and take care of everything even when I know I can’t. I tire myself endlessly worrying and fixing all the little things that I forget about enjoying the moment. I need to accept the fact that there are certain things and circumstances, people included, that are beyond my control and just have to be left alone on its own. I can’t possibly do everything. Enough said.

I’m slowly learning how to let go of the things I cannot control. Taking the back seat is actually better than the driver seat. I know I can’t chase all the cars anyway. Besides I’ve discovered the ride is more enjoyable this way. It gives me more “ME time” to enjoy the peace and quiet that I need.